My son Martin had congenital heart disease and before first going to a children's hospice when Martin was young we hadn't had a family holiday. Martin had around 15 operations - some on his heart, some elsewhere, and this meant that he was either recovering from surgery or was too ill to go on holiday. Martin has a younger brother, Gary, and his Dad would take him away for a long weekend to see his parents in Norfolk, but never for much longer.
We live in Reading and when Martin was growing up we were able to go to Naomi House children's hospice in Winchester, which was just amazing. I could go and stay with both boys and we would have a good time. My husband, Paul, could go to Norfolk and have an opportunity to relax too. He got a proper break.
It was wonderful when we could go to Naomi House as a family, just as families can be at Helen House. You see, when your child is in hospital it means that you are separated from your other child and it can be so hard for them at home. It tears you in two as a mother. Having the chance to be together is invaluable. We met a lot of wonderful people at Naomi House over the eight years that we stayed there and I do miss them.
However, as Martin grew older I started to get a bit worried about where he could go once he got to 18. I used to go on the internet at Naomi House desperately looking for somewhere for Martin to go. All I could find were day-care centres and they just aren't appropriate, as they're really for elderly people and Martin was only a young man.
When I found out that Douglas House was being built I kept following the developments. The staff at Naomi House helped us to get in contact. The transfer was just wonderful - I had been worried sick that for some reason we couldn't get in. Finding somewhere that appealed to us was such a great relief that it was like a giant weight had been swept off my shoulders. 
We knew that Naomi House was going to be a hard act to follow but Douglas House was well and truly its equal. They're both the same but different if you know what I mean. Douglas House was appropriate for his age and a place where he always had a great time. There's always something to do.
For me, it was a place where I didn't have to put on a brave face. I could just let it all go. The staff know if you're bluffing about how you're really feeling and before you know it the barriers that you're so used to keeping up, come down.
When we were at home I never had me-time. If I went into town I rushed around doing everything to make sure I was home as soon as I could to be with Martin. If I needed some new clothes I might have time to try on just one thing on if I was lucky. When we went to Oxford though I could spend all day in town, trying on clothes to my heart's content. On one visit I even had time to get a bit lost, but all I had to do was call Douglas House and they got me back. And, most importantly I didn't have to worry about Martin.
During one of our visits to Douglas House I came to the decision that I was going to learn to drive. Because the Care Team were able to look after Martin, I had time to sort out my finances and work out the practicalities and how to fit it all in around Martin's care.
There's just so much to do at Douglas House it's fantastic. When we were there one time we actually had the time to go to the chapel and say a few prayers for my mum who had recently died. We both enjoyed that. Then at the other end of the spectrum that night we all howled with laughter at the comedy club, Jongleurs!
Another time, we were invited to a celebrity go-karting event in aid of Helen & Douglas House and Martin actually got to go in a two-man go-kart round the track and he'd never been able to do anything like that before. He also got to meet Neil Fox who was one of his favourite DJ's.
Editor's Note: Sadly Martin died at the age of 24 in 2007.
